Last week, all the top dogs in my company convened in Dallas, including one individual from my office. This individual just informed me that an attendee of that conference has since been quarantined under suspicion of harboring SWINE FLU!
I CANNOT get swine flu right now, I’m too focused on my career.
Official lab results due sometime today.
----------------------
Results are in: Just regular flu. Forget we ever had this discussion.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Saturday, April 25, 2009
I'll get used to it eventually, I suppose
This is what Penny normally looks like:
This is her as of this morning:
Jon took her to the groomers without me and told them to "chop it all off as short as possible". This is the only decent shot we got of it. She's pretty much the least photogenic dog ever. Scroll down for the most disturbing picture you've ever seen ................. IF YOU DARE.
(down)
(down)
...aaaaaand, cue horror music.
This is her as of this morning:
Jon took her to the groomers without me and told them to "chop it all off as short as possible". This is the only decent shot we got of it. She's pretty much the least photogenic dog ever. Scroll down for the most disturbing picture you've ever seen ................. IF YOU DARE.
(down)
(down)
...aaaaaand, cue horror music.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
some answers.
So we’ve understandably had lots of questions thrown our way about our med school endeavor. Figured I’d address them here and give an update.
First and foremost: I pronounce it “Cuh-RIB-ee-en”. “Care-uh-BEE-en” is generally gross, only allowable when saying “Pirates of the Caribbean”, and has no place in any other context.
Second, no, we still haven’t decided on a school. For one thing, we’re still hearing back, and for another, there are lots and lots of things to take into consideration. We’ve already narrowed down the list substantially, but a final decision will require more time, more research, and more pondering. For now, it’s sort of a muddled mess involving comparisons of costs of living, the schools’ clinical opportunities, the island’s accessibility, populations, LDS communities, crime/literacy/infant mortality rates, island amenities, etc etc etc. Hopefully it will become more clear within another week or so.
Third, most apartments in the Caribbean are furnished, so we don’t need to worry about shipping everything we own there. We’ll take some clothes, bed and bath linens, an air mattress, and some personal items with us. We’re selling most of our furniture (it’s all old, anyway) and storing the rest of it in Idaho in my parent’s crawlspace. Thank goodness they consented – the cost of public storage in Tucson is absolutely ridiculous. Look it up if you don’t believe me. Even with the cost of shipping everything to Idaho, we’ll still be saving thousands. We’re sending it all up by freight. My sister Annie and her husband Steve will be taking our new couches until we return (thanks, guys!!). We searched for three years for these couches and they’re the first ones we’ve ever found that we both agreed on. Jon was so particular that he’d write off an entire set if the height of the ottoman wasn’t perfectly even with the height of the couch cushions. An inch or two above or below and it was all over, no matter how much I loved them. With the fear of another three years of couch shopping looming in my mind, I would do almost anything to hang on to these. Luckily Annie and Steve live not an hour from where our freight truck will be delivering our things, so with the help of my dad’s Dodge, it won’t be hard at all to get them to their home.
And finally - our cars. We're undecided. We're selling the Jeep for sure, but the Mazda's future is still up in the air. I'm not sure Jon could ever part with it.
Sorry for the boringest post ever. I'm rewarding you for putting up with it by revealing something truly embarrassing about myself. The following song is my ultimate guilty, guilty, guilty pleasure. Don't judge me. It makes me happy. I want to dance to it on the beach.
You'd be lying your face off if you said it wasn't catchy.
First and foremost: I pronounce it “Cuh-RIB-ee-en”. “Care-uh-BEE-en” is generally gross, only allowable when saying “Pirates of the Caribbean”, and has no place in any other context.
Second, no, we still haven’t decided on a school. For one thing, we’re still hearing back, and for another, there are lots and lots of things to take into consideration. We’ve already narrowed down the list substantially, but a final decision will require more time, more research, and more pondering. For now, it’s sort of a muddled mess involving comparisons of costs of living, the schools’ clinical opportunities, the island’s accessibility, populations, LDS communities, crime/literacy/infant mortality rates, island amenities, etc etc etc. Hopefully it will become more clear within another week or so.
Third, most apartments in the Caribbean are furnished, so we don’t need to worry about shipping everything we own there. We’ll take some clothes, bed and bath linens, an air mattress, and some personal items with us. We’re selling most of our furniture (it’s all old, anyway) and storing the rest of it in Idaho in my parent’s crawlspace. Thank goodness they consented – the cost of public storage in Tucson is absolutely ridiculous. Look it up if you don’t believe me. Even with the cost of shipping everything to Idaho, we’ll still be saving thousands. We’re sending it all up by freight. My sister Annie and her husband Steve will be taking our new couches until we return (thanks, guys!!). We searched for three years for these couches and they’re the first ones we’ve ever found that we both agreed on. Jon was so particular that he’d write off an entire set if the height of the ottoman wasn’t perfectly even with the height of the couch cushions. An inch or two above or below and it was all over, no matter how much I loved them. With the fear of another three years of couch shopping looming in my mind, I would do almost anything to hang on to these. Luckily Annie and Steve live not an hour from where our freight truck will be delivering our things, so with the help of my dad’s Dodge, it won’t be hard at all to get them to their home.
And finally - our cars. We're undecided. We're selling the Jeep for sure, but the Mazda's future is still up in the air. I'm not sure Jon could ever part with it.
Sorry for the boringest post ever. I'm rewarding you for putting up with it by revealing something truly embarrassing about myself. The following song is my ultimate guilty, guilty, guilty pleasure. Don't judge me. It makes me happy. I want to dance to it on the beach.
You'd be lying your face off if you said it wasn't catchy.
Friday, April 17, 2009
33
Easter weekend last year, after filling up the Jeep with gas, Jon returned to the driver’s seat all freaked out because it had cost exactly thirty-three dollars and thirty-three cents to fill the tank, and “that’s how old Jesus was when he died”. Easter weekend, $33.33. Crept him right out. I laughed for an hour, then forgot all about it until yesterday morning when he woke up and exclaimed, “I’m as old as Jesus!”. I considered gifting him a white robe and some sandals in honor of this birthday milestone, but ultimately decided against it (though Jon tells a hilarious story of a new convert attending a Halloween institute dance dressed up as Jesus. I wish I'd been there!). Instead, I got him the usual – a DVD, a sixer of his favorite non-alcoholic beer-flavored beverage, blah blah blah. Borrrring. Worst wife ever.
When I asked him what he was going to spend his birthday money on, he told me he was buying us both Keen sandals in preparation for moving to the Caribbean. TOO BAD, though, because we already bought them last week, NOT for his birthday, and there is NO WAY I'm allowing him to pass that off as his gift to himself. He’s always trying to do that – spend his birthday money on gas, groceries, etc. My mom has taken to getting him ONLY gift cards so he doesn’t have that option, but whenever she enlists me to figure out where he wants his card from, he always drags his feet for so long that I want to call her back and say, “ANTHROPOLOGIE. He wants a gift card to ANTHROPOLOGIE.”
Yes. We bought Keens, so I guess it’s official now. We ARE moving to an island. Jon’s been trying to get me to buy some for years now, but I never had any use for them. Let’s be honest, it’s not like I’m apt to up and hike the Narrows at any given moment, and before now that was really the only reason I could foresee having a use for high-tech hybrid waterproof shoes.
We got them in Phoenix last weekend. Then Penny contracted some form of stomach virus or something on Easter Sunday at my aunt and uncle's house, and it was not pleasant. Jon had to correct me twice when I misidentified the substance she was sharing her crate with. And that's all I want to say about it, because a delicious-looking lemon cake just came out of the oven, and I plan on eating at least two large slices of it immediately. Yes, it's a belated birthday cake, and I don't want to hear about it.
Happy Weekend!
When I asked him what he was going to spend his birthday money on, he told me he was buying us both Keen sandals in preparation for moving to the Caribbean. TOO BAD, though, because we already bought them last week, NOT for his birthday, and there is NO WAY I'm allowing him to pass that off as his gift to himself. He’s always trying to do that – spend his birthday money on gas, groceries, etc. My mom has taken to getting him ONLY gift cards so he doesn’t have that option, but whenever she enlists me to figure out where he wants his card from, he always drags his feet for so long that I want to call her back and say, “ANTHROPOLOGIE. He wants a gift card to ANTHROPOLOGIE.”
Yes. We bought Keens, so I guess it’s official now. We ARE moving to an island. Jon’s been trying to get me to buy some for years now, but I never had any use for them. Let’s be honest, it’s not like I’m apt to up and hike the Narrows at any given moment, and before now that was really the only reason I could foresee having a use for high-tech hybrid waterproof shoes.
We got them in Phoenix last weekend. Then Penny contracted some form of stomach virus or something on Easter Sunday at my aunt and uncle's house, and it was not pleasant. Jon had to correct me twice when I misidentified the substance she was sharing her crate with. And that's all I want to say about it, because a delicious-looking lemon cake just came out of the oven, and I plan on eating at least two large slices of it immediately. Yes, it's a belated birthday cake, and I don't want to hear about it.
Happy Weekend!
Friday, April 10, 2009
So............you like.....stuff?
I’ll tell you one thing I’m not looking forward to in preparation of this move – I’m not looking forward to the inevitable battle over Jon’s old things. If it were just a matter of de-junking, I would have eagerly started a month ago. But it’s not that easy. Throw Jon into the mix and the next thing you know, he’s threatening to cut off his right arm in exchange for that Hooter’s shot glass. It’s a mentality that, try as I might, I just can’t comprehend. Every inanimate object in the world that I have a sentimental attachment to fits into one medium-sized Tupperware container that sits on the top shelf in our closet. Every object that JON has a sentimental attachment to fills up the rest of our apartment, his parents’ basement, and MY parents’ basement. For those keeping track, that means his stuff spans two countries. Soon to be three.
And I’m not just talking about childhood keepsakes and souvenirs from his travels. I’m talking about entirely useless things that I have never known a human being to be attached to. For example. When we lived in Rexburg, he took to the notion that he had to have documentation of every single purchase he’s ever made, no matter how small. Next thing I know we’re drowning in receipts. They. Were. EVERYWHERE. Each time we grabbed a quick lunch at Wendy’s, the evidence was left to float around our apartment until he rounded it up into one of the receipt boxes he stored under the couch. Luckily he seems to have outgrown that particular phase. I’ll never forget the first time a convenience store clerk asked if we needed proof of purchase and JON TURNED IT DOWN. I fell down on the floor and had a fit of joy. Crying and laughing all at the same time. The clerk was all, “wtf?”.
So we’ve made some progress in the past few years. He actually got rid of a ninety year old Stussy T-shirt (though not before trimming off the sleeves and parading around the apartment in it) and a couple of pairs of jeans that had holes in certain crotchrial regions, pertaining to the crotch. So that’s encouraging. But I know that the second I suggest we get rid of this:
Or this:
I may not be met with enthusiasm.
We’re working on it.
----------------------------------------------
Jon’s reaction to this post [direct quote, received via email]:
“My ‘sentimental stuff’ fits into 2 hockey bags. My ‘useful garbage’ fills stadiums, and that is a scientific fact.”
And I’m not just talking about childhood keepsakes and souvenirs from his travels. I’m talking about entirely useless things that I have never known a human being to be attached to. For example. When we lived in Rexburg, he took to the notion that he had to have documentation of every single purchase he’s ever made, no matter how small. Next thing I know we’re drowning in receipts. They. Were. EVERYWHERE. Each time we grabbed a quick lunch at Wendy’s, the evidence was left to float around our apartment until he rounded it up into one of the receipt boxes he stored under the couch. Luckily he seems to have outgrown that particular phase. I’ll never forget the first time a convenience store clerk asked if we needed proof of purchase and JON TURNED IT DOWN. I fell down on the floor and had a fit of joy. Crying and laughing all at the same time. The clerk was all, “wtf?”.
So we’ve made some progress in the past few years. He actually got rid of a ninety year old Stussy T-shirt (though not before trimming off the sleeves and parading around the apartment in it) and a couple of pairs of jeans that had holes in certain crotchrial regions, pertaining to the crotch. So that’s encouraging. But I know that the second I suggest we get rid of this:
Or this:
I may not be met with enthusiasm.
We’re working on it.
----------------------------------------------
Jon’s reaction to this post [direct quote, received via email]:
“My ‘sentimental stuff’ fits into 2 hockey bags. My ‘useful garbage’ fills stadiums, and that is a scientific fact.”
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Texting, Episode IV
My cell phone inbox is full again! Seems to be an ongoing battle. Unfortunately, this time around there wasn’t TONS of fodder, but that’s not exactly my fault now is it?
Prior episodes and further explanation can be found here, here, and here.
-----------------------
“Secretly liked the name Olive until I watched the FLDS Texas compound episode of Oprah and one of the girls was named Olive. Ruined it.”
“It was fun and we were all wearing sports bras.”
“I just realized that Oprah’s eyes are about a half-inch too far apart.”
“Just saw a guy walking around with a cat on his head.”
[during Obama’s first address to the nation]: “Maaan, we’re missing Fringe. Who talks for an HOUR? What is this? Conference?”
“I was in a public bathroom today and a lady was going pee next to me and it was LITERALLY like a fire hose.”
---------------------------
Two Oprah references, that’s a first. Anyone else have some good ones? No? Just kidding. I’d also like to publicly express my disgust at Twitter for absorbing my most recent updates. I could only remember one of them, which I recreated, but now the timestamps are all screwed up and it bugs me more than it should. I don’t want to talk about it.
We found out yesterday that Jon got accepted to our (okay, my) top pick for med school – huzzah!
That’s all for now.
Prior episodes and further explanation can be found here, here, and here.
-----------------------
“Secretly liked the name Olive until I watched the FLDS Texas compound episode of Oprah and one of the girls was named Olive. Ruined it.”
“It was fun and we were all wearing sports bras.”
“I just realized that Oprah’s eyes are about a half-inch too far apart.”
“Just saw a guy walking around with a cat on his head.”
[during Obama’s first address to the nation]: “Maaan, we’re missing Fringe. Who talks for an HOUR? What is this? Conference?”
“I was in a public bathroom today and a lady was going pee next to me and it was LITERALLY like a fire hose.”
---------------------------
Two Oprah references, that’s a first. Anyone else have some good ones? No? Just kidding. I’d also like to publicly express my disgust at Twitter for absorbing my most recent updates. I could only remember one of them, which I recreated, but now the timestamps are all screwed up and it bugs me more than it should. I don’t want to talk about it.
We found out yesterday that Jon got accepted to our (okay, my) top pick for med school – huzzah!
That’s all for now.
Monday, April 06, 2009
this blog is about to get even awesomer
So, we’re moving to the Caribbean! It’s for sure for sure. Jon got into med school (I know! You didn’t even know he was applying! We’re tricky!) for the fall semester. Where, we’re not absolutely certain. So far he’s been accepted to three, with more sure to follow in the next week or two. He's going to be an MD when all is said and done, and we're living in the Caribbean for 20 months starting in September. He does his basic coursework there (classroom stuff) then he finishes up in the States. Or Canada, if we so choose.
We didn’t tell a soul we were even thinking about it. Not even parents. It was sort of a shock for my poor mom (“Jon’s going to med school. In the Caribbean. And he already got in. Will you take our dog for a while?”). Sort of a lot to spring on a mother all at once. Luckily, everyone is really supportive, and yes, my parents are happy to take Penny. Though I still feel torn up about it. But between pet import laws, the cost of shipping, etc etc (it’s a long story that may or may not have involved me crying for two days after reading about dogs being euthanized in Caribbean airports), we decided it just won’t be possible to take her with us. My parents have two other dogs and a large acreage and she’ll be happy as a clam there running around and eating horse poo to her little heart's content, so I’m getting more and more used to the idea. She’ll probably hate me when I try to take her away. I’m imagining me dragging her to the car and her nails slicing the asphalt of my parents’ driveway.
Anyway, this is something we’ve been thinking about for a long time, and when Jon lost his job it was that final push we needed. We’ve been researching nonstop and feel confident in our decision. We’ll be leaving Tucson sometime in July to spend a few weeks in Utah, Idaho, and Alberta, and New York (seeing the new baby!) before we take off for good. The amount of stuff we have to get done between now and then is giving me permanent angina. Please come visit us when we're there. Srsly. Open invitation.
------------
PS- Completely unrelated: today was a big day for my little blog! Aside from this announcement, my brother-in-law Kyle caused some buzz over the Rexburg names list (below) when he posted the link to his twitter AND Facebook accounts…exposing it to about 1,000 people combined. Then these guys picked up on it, too. See my twitter feed for more info.
We didn’t tell a soul we were even thinking about it. Not even parents. It was sort of a shock for my poor mom (“Jon’s going to med school. In the Caribbean. And he already got in. Will you take our dog for a while?”). Sort of a lot to spring on a mother all at once. Luckily, everyone is really supportive, and yes, my parents are happy to take Penny. Though I still feel torn up about it. But between pet import laws, the cost of shipping, etc etc (it’s a long story that may or may not have involved me crying for two days after reading about dogs being euthanized in Caribbean airports), we decided it just won’t be possible to take her with us. My parents have two other dogs and a large acreage and she’ll be happy as a clam there running around and eating horse poo to her little heart's content, so I’m getting more and more used to the idea. She’ll probably hate me when I try to take her away. I’m imagining me dragging her to the car and her nails slicing the asphalt of my parents’ driveway.
Anyway, this is something we’ve been thinking about for a long time, and when Jon lost his job it was that final push we needed. We’ve been researching nonstop and feel confident in our decision. We’ll be leaving Tucson sometime in July to spend a few weeks in Utah, Idaho, and Alberta, and New York (seeing the new baby!) before we take off for good. The amount of stuff we have to get done between now and then is giving me permanent angina. Please come visit us when we're there. Srsly. Open invitation.
------------
PS- Completely unrelated: today was a big day for my little blog! Aside from this announcement, my brother-in-law Kyle caused some buzz over the Rexburg names list (below) when he posted the link to his twitter AND Facebook accounts…exposing it to about 1,000 people combined. Then these guys picked up on it, too. See my twitter feed for more info.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
NAMES 2008!
It has arrived! The Annual Madison Memorial Hospital Birth Announcement Extravaganza is here. I spent an hour last night cackling to myself and taking notes. Let’s have a look back at the best of the worst Rexburg baby names of 2008, shall we? (if you’re lost, check out the second half of THIS post)
The “To-Be-Expecteds” (ie, mix-n-match): As bad as they are, we knew these were coming.
Brysen
Kyson
Kaybree
Rayden
Harlee (THREE little girls named this. I really wish whoever had decided this was okay had run it past me first)
Blah blah blah. I got sick of these names. There are dozens of them, in every variation imaginable. Eventually I quit writing them down.
The “Sound-it-Outs”:
Lundyn
Konnur
Kenideigh
Xoie
Adicyne
The “Completely Unnecessary Extra T’s”: Interesting emerging trend.
Eastton
Huntter
Hilarious Twin Combinations:
Boisen and Payah (is that like, someone from Boise?)
Brinley Sue and Augree Lynn
Tylenn Braylee and Tyken Raylee (my favorite of these three sets, obviously. Though Augree is pretty fantastic, too.)
Aaaand the moment we’ve all been waiting for….the “What the EFF?!?!!’s”:
Ledger
Tymber
Creedon (cretin?)
Chasitie (not a typo…cha-sit-ee)
Jakolby
a ‘Tavian’ and a ‘Tayvian’, two boys who are seemingly unrelated. How is that even possible??
Zaylee
Taicyr (?)
Krayson
Shikendra
Taggart (HAHAhahHahaAHA)
A poor boy named Traigyn Azure (GYN?? GYN?? Are you serious??!)
Kazley
Cedar
Please note: There were also THREE Ridges, TWO Drakes, and a little boy named Ashtynn. Plus, remember how many Braxton/Braxten/Braxtyns there were last year? It’s been replaced by Ryker. RYKER!! As in Commander Riker from Star Trek. There were FOUR babies named that in Rexburg last year! Every time I ran across another one, I screamed even louder than before. Ask Jon. Amazing.
PS- If you knew I had a crush on Commander Riker circa 1992, you’re a winner. Corinne liked Wesley Crusher. Annie liked Data.
PSS - My spell checker is going nuts.
The “To-Be-Expecteds” (ie, mix-n-match): As bad as they are, we knew these were coming.
Brysen
Kyson
Kaybree
Rayden
Harlee (THREE little girls named this. I really wish whoever had decided this was okay had run it past me first)
Blah blah blah. I got sick of these names. There are dozens of them, in every variation imaginable. Eventually I quit writing them down.
The “Sound-it-Outs”:
Lundyn
Konnur
Kenideigh
Xoie
Adicyne
The “Completely Unnecessary Extra T’s”: Interesting emerging trend.
Eastton
Huntter
Hilarious Twin Combinations:
Boisen and Payah (is that like, someone from Boise?)
Brinley Sue and Augree Lynn
Tylenn Braylee and Tyken Raylee (my favorite of these three sets, obviously. Though Augree is pretty fantastic, too.)
Aaaand the moment we’ve all been waiting for….the “What the EFF?!?!!’s”:
Ledger
Tymber
Creedon (cretin?)
Chasitie (not a typo…cha-sit-ee)
Jakolby
a ‘Tavian’ and a ‘Tayvian’, two boys who are seemingly unrelated. How is that even possible??
Zaylee
Taicyr (?)
Krayson
Shikendra
Taggart (HAHAhahHahaAHA)
A poor boy named Traigyn Azure (GYN?? GYN?? Are you serious??!)
Kazley
Cedar
Please note: There were also THREE Ridges, TWO Drakes, and a little boy named Ashtynn. Plus, remember how many Braxton/Braxten/Braxtyns there were last year? It’s been replaced by Ryker. RYKER!! As in Commander Riker from Star Trek. There were FOUR babies named that in Rexburg last year! Every time I ran across another one, I screamed even louder than before. Ask Jon. Amazing.
PS- If you knew I had a crush on Commander Riker circa 1992, you’re a winner. Corinne liked Wesley Crusher. Annie liked Data.
PSS - My spell checker is going nuts.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Overall, I'd say two thumbs up, one thumb down.
The dreaded dentist appointment was yesterday. It was about as comfortable as having four teeth drilled out of your head could possibly be. Srsly. I had a blanket, ear phones playing Norah Jones, sunglasses, a memory foam pillow, and copious drugs during the procedure. The aftermath has been what’s killing me – who cares about having the actual work done? My face and jaw STILL hurt. And I can’t open my mouth all the way. Apparently the old fillings the dentist replaced were worse than he’d originally thought, so he let me know ahead of time that I’d probably have pain. And I do. Really bad. Jon did such a good job taking care of me, though, and I really am grateful that I was able to get this work done. Thanks to dental insurance it only cost just over $100 bucks to get my entire mouth fixed. And the office I’ve been seeing has been great. The dentist even called from his home last night to see how I was holding up and to say I’d done a great job, which made the five-year-old inside me beam. And Jon stole me a Kern’s mango juice from the mini-fridge, so you can imagine that I’m looking forward to THAT. But I can hardly eat anything – Jon made me Jello and mashed potatoes for dinner last night. I had yogue and some soup for lunch today. At least I came into work, so I must not be too bad off. Just sore. Plus, the molars he worked on are all ground down and flat now, so that’s pretty weird. Getting used to it. Gumming my food. And I sound like I have Bell’s Palsy when I talk. Other than that, things went well, thanks for asking.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
mishmash
WARNING – this post jumps around a lot.
To begin, I’ve been made aware that BYU-Idaho has removed all Naked Juice products from their bookstore. Why? Because it’s called Naked Juice. (WOW.) I guess at this point, all you can really do is shake your head and say, “Rexburg, you are a silly, silly town. And everyone thinks you’re weird.”
And THAT’S being NICE.
In other Rexburg related news, my mom has promised that she is mailing the annual listing of birth announcements from Madison Memorial Hospital to me TODAY. I could not possibly be more excited to make fun of the words Idaho parents have written down on their newborns’ birth certificates. The words their children will go by from now until eternity. So stay tuned for THAT.
Speaking of birth announcements (sorta) - CORINNE’S HAVING A GIRL! I thought it was a boy for sure. But I always tend to be wrong on these things. Corinne’s thoughts on the ultrasound [exact quote, because it was via email and I copied and pasted] “It's so amazing. You get to see everything, though a lot of it just looks like blobs. And the baby turned and looked at us and it was absolutely terrifying!!”
So, I just got back from the dentist about an hour ago. Today it was a typical cleaning, but on Monday at 3:00 the horror begins. I have to have TWO cavities filled and TWO fillings redone. Before you think I’m some revolting swamp creature, let me just say that the dentist spent nearly thirty minutes complimenting me on my beautiful teeth and telling me what a wonderful job I’ve done with my home care before breaking the news to me. I was feeling pretty smug, but then he knocked me down a few notches. I screamed for an hour. PS- I never know what to do with my tongue during cleanings. It does an awkward dance with the hygienists fingers. Like when you meet someone in a hallway and unsuccessfully predict which way they’re going to go. Anyone else ever have that problem during a teeth cleaning? Yes? No? Yes? Maybe? A little? Just kidding..
Remember when Jon got smashed in an elevator? Seems forever ago. Because it was. Well after over a year of the building management company avoiding his phone calls, he’s finally in talks with a serious lawyer. And WOULD YOU BELIEVE IT, the second there’s a serious lawyer involved, Jon’s on the phone with management’s insurance company. Funny how that works. Hopefully they’ll settle with us, because going to court would be stupid and non-fun. Not to mention lame.
And that’s the news for now. Kthxbai.
Oh yeah, we made banana bread on Sunday and it was really, really good.
To begin, I’ve been made aware that BYU-Idaho has removed all Naked Juice products from their bookstore. Why? Because it’s called Naked Juice. (WOW.) I guess at this point, all you can really do is shake your head and say, “Rexburg, you are a silly, silly town. And everyone thinks you’re weird.”
And THAT’S being NICE.
In other Rexburg related news, my mom has promised that she is mailing the annual listing of birth announcements from Madison Memorial Hospital to me TODAY. I could not possibly be more excited to make fun of the words Idaho parents have written down on their newborns’ birth certificates. The words their children will go by from now until eternity. So stay tuned for THAT.
Speaking of birth announcements (sorta) - CORINNE’S HAVING A GIRL! I thought it was a boy for sure. But I always tend to be wrong on these things. Corinne’s thoughts on the ultrasound [exact quote, because it was via email and I copied and pasted] “It's so amazing. You get to see everything, though a lot of it just looks like blobs. And the baby turned and looked at us and it was absolutely terrifying!!”
So, I just got back from the dentist about an hour ago. Today it was a typical cleaning, but on Monday at 3:00 the horror begins. I have to have TWO cavities filled and TWO fillings redone. Before you think I’m some revolting swamp creature, let me just say that the dentist spent nearly thirty minutes complimenting me on my beautiful teeth and telling me what a wonderful job I’ve done with my home care before breaking the news to me. I was feeling pretty smug, but then he knocked me down a few notches. I screamed for an hour. PS- I never know what to do with my tongue during cleanings. It does an awkward dance with the hygienists fingers. Like when you meet someone in a hallway and unsuccessfully predict which way they’re going to go. Anyone else ever have that problem during a teeth cleaning? Yes? No? Yes? Maybe? A little? Just kidding..
Remember when Jon got smashed in an elevator? Seems forever ago. Because it was. Well after over a year of the building management company avoiding his phone calls, he’s finally in talks with a serious lawyer. And WOULD YOU BELIEVE IT, the second there’s a serious lawyer involved, Jon’s on the phone with management’s insurance company. Funny how that works. Hopefully they’ll settle with us, because going to court would be stupid and non-fun. Not to mention lame.
And that’s the news for now. Kthxbai.
Oh yeah, we made banana bread on Sunday and it was really, really good.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Monday, March 09, 2009
Neighborly love
Well, it’s Monday. I can’t complain though because we had a really great weekend in Phoenix. Friday night we had delicious Mexican food for dinner and spent time catching up with my aunt Stacey and uncle Dave. On Saturday, Jon and I went to the temple and afterwards we all went on a short hike. Jon caught (and was bit by) a green racer snake. It was a little too cold to swim in their pool so we spent some time in the jacuzzi instead. Penny was hilarious – standing on the edge, she kept putting her face in the water trying to catch the bubbles in her mouth. Inevitably she started pawing at the swirling surface until she fell in. I scooped her out, but apparently she didn’t mind the warm water because she kept diving back in and swimming around, all the while chomping at the bubbles Pac-Man style. I laughed until I cried. That night my aunt made us a gourmet steak dinner and Jon ate at least six pounds of beef. After church, lunch, and an accidental nap on Sunday we headed back to Tucson. Which brings me to the next point of this post. Remember this neighbor? Could he possibly be any more frustrating? Answer: Yes. Before leaving for our weekend, I stood just outside our door with a pen and a piece of paper and took inventory of all his junk that has taken residence in our entryway. Here is the list – no hint of exaggeration:
2 strollers
2 of those big plastic kiddie push cars
1 SteamVac
1 small yellow chair
An upsidedown broken bike
A scooter
Inflated pool toys (notice the wording – I didn’t say “inflatABLE” pool toys, I said “inflatED” pool toys)
A ‘fun noodle’ pool toy
This crap heap has been slowly accumulating over the past few weeks. In addition to these constants, there is on occasion a nice garbage bag full of noxious diapers sitting out there for hours at a time. You know, in case their next-door neighbors happen to enjoy the smell of human fecal matter greeting them after a long day’s work.
Well, since I’ve already complained on this particular person before, I made Jon do it this time. His exact words to management were “Tell our neighbor to clean up our entryway, it looks like a junkyard”. That was right before we left for Phoenix. Upon arriving home Sunday evening we were teeming with anticipation. Did management take our complaint seriously? Was everything spic and span? Nope; Even better.
Someone spent at least three minutes shuffling things closer to their wall. Look at how nice those strollers look, all lined up like that. And you hardly even notice the vacuum sitting there now that it’s partially blocked by the yellow chair. And really, I could not even think of a better place for that broken bicycle. Very feng shui. Great work, neighbor. Great work. Just kidding! I’m being facetious! Remember when I was pretending to be impressed with my neighbor’s organizational skills?? That was funny. No, actually, I’m not impressed. In fact, you could say that I’m the exact opposite of impressed. I’m non-impressed. We really do win for the worst neighbors ever. As if it’s not bad enough that he looks in through our windows. He’s also a GROSS SLOB. Ha! Take THAT!
So what do I do at this point? Complain to management again? Continue kvetching to Jon every time I have to look at it? Leave a passive-aggressive note? Slowly begin making their stuff disappear? Call it in as a fire-hazard? (That was Corinne's suggestion. I like the way she thinks.)
PS – I guess in all fairness they DID get rid of the pool toys. And either the scooter is gone or it’s not visible from this angle (my guess is it’s in front of the bike alongside that wall). BUT THAT’S NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
2 strollers
2 of those big plastic kiddie push cars
1 SteamVac
1 small yellow chair
An upsidedown broken bike
A scooter
Inflated pool toys (notice the wording – I didn’t say “inflatABLE” pool toys, I said “inflatED” pool toys)
A ‘fun noodle’ pool toy
This crap heap has been slowly accumulating over the past few weeks. In addition to these constants, there is on occasion a nice garbage bag full of noxious diapers sitting out there for hours at a time. You know, in case their next-door neighbors happen to enjoy the smell of human fecal matter greeting them after a long day’s work.
Well, since I’ve already complained on this particular person before, I made Jon do it this time. His exact words to management were “Tell our neighbor to clean up our entryway, it looks like a junkyard”. That was right before we left for Phoenix. Upon arriving home Sunday evening we were teeming with anticipation. Did management take our complaint seriously? Was everything spic and span? Nope; Even better.
Someone spent at least three minutes shuffling things closer to their wall. Look at how nice those strollers look, all lined up like that. And you hardly even notice the vacuum sitting there now that it’s partially blocked by the yellow chair. And really, I could not even think of a better place for that broken bicycle. Very feng shui. Great work, neighbor. Great work. Just kidding! I’m being facetious! Remember when I was pretending to be impressed with my neighbor’s organizational skills?? That was funny. No, actually, I’m not impressed. In fact, you could say that I’m the exact opposite of impressed. I’m non-impressed. We really do win for the worst neighbors ever. As if it’s not bad enough that he looks in through our windows. He’s also a GROSS SLOB. Ha! Take THAT!
So what do I do at this point? Complain to management again? Continue kvetching to Jon every time I have to look at it? Leave a passive-aggressive note? Slowly begin making their stuff disappear? Call it in as a fire-hazard? (That was Corinne's suggestion. I like the way she thinks.)
PS – I guess in all fairness they DID get rid of the pool toys. And either the scooter is gone or it’s not visible from this angle (my guess is it’s in front of the bike alongside that wall). BUT THAT’S NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
Monday, March 02, 2009
Saturday is a special day
This weekend I set out to recreate Café Rio’s sweet shredded pork and cilantro-lime rice, and thanks to this recipe and this recipe, I came pretty close. Hooray for Google!
FOR THE PORK:
2 to 2½ pounds pork loin
3 cans regular Coke
1 ¼ cup brown sugar
dash garlic salt
1/4 cup water
1 can diced green chilies
1 can green enchilada sauce
With the least amount of touching possible, rinse the pork (ew). Trim the fatty and sinewy pieces off (I almost threw up). Put it in a heavy-duty Ziploc with a can and a half of Coke and ¼ cup brown sugar to marinate. We put the bag inside of a bowl and set it in the fridge overnight.
Next morning: Transfer the raw pork to your slow-cooker along with ½ can of Coke, ¼ cup water, and a dash of garlic salt. Make your husband discard the filthy marinade.
Cook on low for 6 hours, then remove the pork and shred it up. Dump out the leftover juices. Blenderize the enchilada sauce, chilies, ½ can Coke and the remaining brown sugar (1 cup) and add it all back into the slow cooker for another 2 hours on low. Tamp down the shredded meat so as much of it as possible is covered with the liquid.
FOR THE RICE:
Prepare 3 cups cooked rice (add a teaspoon of lime juice into the water for the cooking process).
Combine 1 tablespoon lime juice, 2 teaspoons sugar, and 3 tablespoons fresh chopped cilantro into separate container. Using some sort of utensil, pound the cilantro to pieces so that it really gets ground into the mixture. Slowly add it to the rice as you fluff. (FULL DISCLOSURE: I just now realized that’s two TEASPOONS of sugar. Our rice definitely had two tablespoons of sugar in it.)
FOR THE SAUCE:
1 cup Herdez Salsa Verde (it’s a tomatillo sauce, and we were able to find it at our Safeway)
½ cup ranch dressing
The original recipe called for equal parts of each, but we found the ranch a little overpowering. Also, to true Café Rio fans – I didn’t set out to make the sweet green sauce they pour all over the burrito to make it “Enchilada Style”, I wanted to make something similar to the creamy tomatillo sauce they serve on the side. This is a little spicier than that other stuff, but still good.
THE GRAND FINALE:
We threw in some black beans and combined the elements into burritos, but it would also be amazing in a salad. The general idea is that the pork is delicious, and it smells delicious, and when you eat it it makes you full. So, really, it’ll be an overall great experience for everyone involved.DO IT NOW.
---------------------------------
…After typing the words “Grand Finale”, I can’t not tell this story. My family and I drove the Al-Can highway when I was 8 years old. From Anchorage, Alaska to Stafford, Virginia, my dad led our procession in his old red Dodge Ram with a canoe on top, pulling our pop-up tent trailer. My mom followed close behind him with all the kids packed into the suburban pulling the horse trailer. We communicated by CB radio and made our home in a different fairground each night so that our horse, Fancy, could stretch her legs in an arena after 10 hours of cramped standing. We’d all pitch in to set up camp, eat some form of hot dog creation for dinner, then we’d settle in to our beds for the evening. And each night without fail, when the lights were out and my mom would try to discreetly remove her bra from underneath her T-shirt, my dad would draw attention to the fact by announcing to everyone, “It’s the grrrrraaaand finaaaaaaleeee!”
Sorry, mom. But aren’t you proud that I spent my entire Saturday cooking?
FOR THE PORK:
2 to 2½ pounds pork loin
3 cans regular Coke
1 ¼ cup brown sugar
dash garlic salt
1/4 cup water
1 can diced green chilies
1 can green enchilada sauce
With the least amount of touching possible, rinse the pork (ew). Trim the fatty and sinewy pieces off (I almost threw up). Put it in a heavy-duty Ziploc with a can and a half of Coke and ¼ cup brown sugar to marinate. We put the bag inside of a bowl and set it in the fridge overnight.
Next morning: Transfer the raw pork to your slow-cooker along with ½ can of Coke, ¼ cup water, and a dash of garlic salt. Make your husband discard the filthy marinade.
Cook on low for 6 hours, then remove the pork and shred it up. Dump out the leftover juices. Blenderize the enchilada sauce, chilies, ½ can Coke and the remaining brown sugar (1 cup) and add it all back into the slow cooker for another 2 hours on low. Tamp down the shredded meat so as much of it as possible is covered with the liquid.
FOR THE RICE:
Prepare 3 cups cooked rice (add a teaspoon of lime juice into the water for the cooking process).
Combine 1 tablespoon lime juice, 2 teaspoons sugar, and 3 tablespoons fresh chopped cilantro into separate container. Using some sort of utensil, pound the cilantro to pieces so that it really gets ground into the mixture. Slowly add it to the rice as you fluff. (FULL DISCLOSURE: I just now realized that’s two TEASPOONS of sugar. Our rice definitely had two tablespoons of sugar in it.)
FOR THE SAUCE:
1 cup Herdez Salsa Verde (it’s a tomatillo sauce, and we were able to find it at our Safeway)
½ cup ranch dressing
The original recipe called for equal parts of each, but we found the ranch a little overpowering. Also, to true Café Rio fans – I didn’t set out to make the sweet green sauce they pour all over the burrito to make it “Enchilada Style”, I wanted to make something similar to the creamy tomatillo sauce they serve on the side. This is a little spicier than that other stuff, but still good.
THE GRAND FINALE:
We threw in some black beans and combined the elements into burritos, but it would also be amazing in a salad. The general idea is that the pork is delicious, and it smells delicious, and when you eat it it makes you full. So, really, it’ll be an overall great experience for everyone involved.DO IT NOW.
---------------------------------
…After typing the words “Grand Finale”, I can’t not tell this story. My family and I drove the Al-Can highway when I was 8 years old. From Anchorage, Alaska to Stafford, Virginia, my dad led our procession in his old red Dodge Ram with a canoe on top, pulling our pop-up tent trailer. My mom followed close behind him with all the kids packed into the suburban pulling the horse trailer. We communicated by CB radio and made our home in a different fairground each night so that our horse, Fancy, could stretch her legs in an arena after 10 hours of cramped standing. We’d all pitch in to set up camp, eat some form of hot dog creation for dinner, then we’d settle in to our beds for the evening. And each night without fail, when the lights were out and my mom would try to discreetly remove her bra from underneath her T-shirt, my dad would draw attention to the fact by announcing to everyone, “It’s the grrrrraaaand finaaaaaaleeee!”
Sorry, mom. But aren’t you proud that I spent my entire Saturday cooking?
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Thursday, February 19, 2009
WEEKEND WITH MY MA
For five glorious days I had my mom all to myself. Among the things we did, in chronological order:
PICTURE TIME! But there are only three so don't get too excited. My mom took more than me so maybe I'll post some of those later.
Our picnic in the park:
And at the horse show:
Um, weird ending. But that's all I've got.
- Had Sonoran hot dogs WHICH SHE LOVED SO I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER WORD ABOUT IT
- Ate a delicious authentic German meal called rouladen - it was always one of my favorite meals growing up so I specifically asked her to teach me to make while she was in town. And yes, I just now learned how to spell 'rouladen' after 23 years of demanding my mother make it for me. This meal also included asparagus and "crash hot potatoes".
- Watched Kung-Fu Panda while tickling each other's backs. Jon did not participate in one portion of this bullet point.
- Went on a drive through Saguaro National Park. Jon and my ma made up a delicious lunch of egg-salad sandwiches, oreos, bananas and Pepsi while I was at work and we took off right when I got home.
- Went to the dog park (twice - once when there was hardly anyone there, and again the next night when it was packed).
- Went to Frost, our favorite gelato shop. Twice.
- Watched highlights from So You Think You Can Dance, season 3.
- Caught a Saturday matinee of Coraline in 3D. I encourage you to do the same.
- Ate lunch at Pei Wei. Mmmm. Honey seared chicken. Mmmm. Rejuvenation. (see previous post)
- Fed the ducks and saw a turtle at Agua Caliente Park - a desert oasis only 10-15 minutes from our apartment.
- Skipped out on most of church to go to the Horses in the Sun show that is currently in Tucson of all places. It's a fairly important equestrian event that travels from city to city. We caught a Grand Prix showjumping competition with a $25,000 purse. It was SO much fun, though Jon later admitted his disappointment that only one person got thrown into one of the jumps.
- Made corned beef, cabbage and potatoes for dinner. Another one of those meals that I grew up on.
- Watched Mamma Mia. Sang along. (but we didn't put it on the "sing along" version of the DVD, so that counts for something, right?)
- Went to the Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum. It's more interesting than it sounds, I promise. It's like a zoo and a museum and a botanical garden all wrapped into one. We were there in time to catch a live demonstration of hawks in flight. We were in the perfect location and even had to duck a couple of times when the hawks dive-bombed through the crowd. The old lady docent hawk-expert that was narrating the demonstration was shocked and appalled when two wild redtail hawks came out of nowhere and mated right over our heads. She was right in the middle of explaining the courting behavior between them when WHAM! Poor female bird never saw it coming. I'm pretty sure some children's eyes got covered. Jon summed it up when he remarked, "......that was definitely PG-13". Anyway, we were in T-shirts the entire day and came home sunburned. Jealous?
- Last but not least, we made rice krispy treats.
PICTURE TIME! But there are only three so don't get too excited. My mom took more than me so maybe I'll post some of those later.
Our picnic in the park:
And at the horse show:
Um, weird ending. But that's all I've got.
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