Friday, January 23, 2009

Texting, Episode III

My cell phone inbox is FULL which means good times for all! In the process of creating room for new messages, I once again have typed up the best ones for your viewing pleasure, sans names or context. Hooray!


Did he get fired? Most companies nowadays fire on first offense. Costco castrates then fires. It's awesome.

I totally just flooded the toilet in [my husband's] mom's bathroom. Worst few minutes of my life.

There is a mom in Sacrament meeting letting her kid suck on her chin. For like 10 minutes. It's obscene.

A hideous dog.

Our power is out. We're sitting here under a blanket. [My husband] is playing Bejeweled and he just started singing Amazing Grace. WHAT?

Haha, "Dangliest".

Look it up, he is dead because Obama hated Jurassic Park.

I just used eggs for brownies that expired May 7. Is that bad? [let it be noted that I received this text on October 21st]

3 and a half inches long. That's huge!!!!

My predictive text always says "Jerrie" before it will say "Jessie".

Someone sent me a text that was supposed to say "good" but they misspelled it and it said "goob". I laughed for days.

No, he just called me a wet blanket because I didn't want to cuddle.

I could feel my heart beating really fast today and it reminded me of super-tacky, then I had the ticky tacky song stuck in my head all day.

The old poo and wander is a classic.


There you have it. Feel free to nominate your favorites, post good ones from your OWN phone on your OWN blog, or just forget you ever saw this. I am so sorry.

The first and second of these posts can be found here and here, respectively.


  1. "I'll have to eat all the Thin Mints myself."

    This is what Adam texted me after he saw today's post. :(

  2. These may not be as entertaining as your set of texts but I'm not very popular. The only people to text me are my brother, and my friend. Ya lame.

    One from my Brother

    "what are you doing?!? LOL, Sexytime?"

  3. Just for the record, the person that sent me that text actually MEANT to write "goob". She was calling me a goob. And who texts in sacrament meeting?? Even if it IS about a child sucking on someone's chin?

  4. Annie: An answer to your question. Your sister...

  5. I love that these are a recurring feature now. Keep it up!

  6. OK, I'm not even sure how I found your blog (link to a link to a link) but I'm glad I did because I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING!!! The texting post is brilliant, oh your poor dog, and the bingo posts.. GREAT CONTENT!

  7. i keep forgetting to do this! next time i have nothing to blog about, i'll have to clean mine out.

    um, that rhymed.

  8. My texts have nothin' on yours!! THey are actually pretty boring :) too funny!!

  9. stupid employers keeping their phones with all my texting

  10. oh me gosh. this is funny. i forgot how cool your blog is...