Friday, September 25, 2015

NYC! NYC! N! Y! C!

I had vague plans to go to NYC sometime later this fall, but when a last-minute work trip cropped up for Jon I couldn't pass up the opportunity to tag along. Jon's flight, taxis to and from airports, and our hotel were covered, plus he received a per diem allowance for food - almost too good to be true. Plus we found a killer deal on my flight (a perk of booking one week in advance) so the trip was practically free!

Flight there: I already had plans to tweet about our 50 year old hellhole of an airplane, and that was BEFORE Jon sat down and fell through his seat. Nearly broke his coccyx. They had to bring a maintenance worker on board to investigate, and she discovered that an entire support beam underneath his seat was somehow completely missing. Luckily there was ONE spare seat on the entire plane, which happened to be in First Class(!!!) They didn't give Jon that seat, though. They upgraded another guy, and put Jon in his seat. Which.................okay.

Anyway, the ordeal delayed us (and probably many other planes behind us). At one point the captain came over the intercom and informed everyone that "a passenger had an issue with his seat" and they were currently filling out incident paperwork. Jon tried his hardest to turn invisible.

Information that would have been useful THIRTY MINUTES AGO.

We stayed at Corinne and Kyle's place our first night. Kyle and Jon went for pizza shortly after we arrived (about one in the morning - yikes). NOM.

Day One: 

Brunch at the Smith

Whitney Museum

View from the top floor

View from the ?th floor

View from the ?th floor

Jon and Corinne looking couple-ish on the ?th floor.

The B****y Resting Face is strong with these two.

Watermelon cucumber popsicles from People's Pops on the Highline

Where we got tacos and the most delicious slice of chocolate cake

Crane City

Jon's gift was a hit

We ate po' boys at a place called Clawdaddy for dinner then it was off to...

...The Slipper Room!! I've been wanting to go for ten years. It was everything I hoped and dreamed it would be. I think I was a burlesque dancer in a past life.

Day two:

We tried to score tickets to Les Mis (didn't happen). But there was a street festival happening en route to the tickets booth in Times Square, and this crepe was worth the failed effort. I do have feet in real life.

We got waffles in Central Park (my favorite thing I ate the entire trip) then walked through Shakespeare Garden.

This squirrel was after my Shake Shack. I cannot disclose how many outtakes (and french fries) this photo took me. But I prevailed! Christa captioned the result a "squelfie."

View from the Met rooftop. There was a beautiful Sargent exhibit there. This was my favorite piece. Simply lovely.

That night we went to a hilarious comedy show. This is how we discovered it:

Lady at church (overheard by Corinne): "So, my husband was in charge of date night last night and he took me to the WEIRDEST thing. It was totally just for him; he wasn't thinking of me at all when he planned it. It was this dumb, low-budget comedy show that was a scene-by-scene reenactment of Jurassic Park. Everyone was laughing hysterically, but I didn't get it. I don't even like Jurassic Park!"

Corinne [sidling into the conversation]: was this.

Unpictured from day two: Indian food for dinner, Eatily for after-the-show dessert.

Day three:

We rode the train into Brooklyn, got pepperoni pizza at a delicious place called Juliana's, and picnicked between the Manhattan and Brooklyn bridges. Not a bad view.

Joseph "winking." I DIE.

We rode the ferry back, which dropped us downtown. Jon and I set off exploring by ourselves for a couple of hours. Trinity Church and cemetary was our first stop, where we observed this tour guide reenacting Alexander Hamilton's death, on Alexander Hamilton's grave.

I wanted to hide behind a bush and make a supercut of people craning their necks to view One World from the sidewalk directly below it. Fourth tallest building on earth.

I guess I didn't get a picture of the 9/11 monuments? They were so, so, beautiful.

That night we (and Corinne and Kyle) karaoked in a private room (just the four of us) in Koreatown, which, as it turns out, is my happy place. 

Jon delighted us all with a perfectly executed version of "Gin and Juice." The scrolling lyrics tried to clean up the language, but Jon would not be censored. Don't watch the following video if the phrase "I got bitches in the living room gettin' it on" offends you.

Gin and Juice from Jessie Jensen on Vimeo.

One of my favorite pictures of myself ever taken. (Snapped by Corinne during "Toxic")

Other crowd favorites: Zombie (Jon), Grace Kelly (me), Break Stuff (Kyle), Alone (duet with me and Kyle - Kyle on the high parts), Chop Suey (Jon), and a heartfelt rendition of Foolish Games (me). Before one of his songs, Kyle said in a deep, cheesy DJ voice: "This one's going out to the Sweet know who you are" and I laughed until I wept.

Unpictured stuff from that day: Skipping rocks between bridges, visiting Kyle's office, Pinkberry, Silver Moon Bakery, and dinner at a Greek place called Kefi (note to self, must go back for fingerling potato appetizer and whatever rabbit/pasta dish Jon got).

Day four:

Jon had to work this day :( I met Corinne at her place and we explored her neighborhood for a couple of hours while Joseph was at preschool.

Inside the Cathedral Church of St John the Divine.

A few months ago I read about this statue. I was moved and the images stayed with me, but I had no idea where the sculpture was installed. As we exited the cathedral into the garden, suddenly there she was. The surprise of stumbling into something so beautiful so unexpectedly literally took my breath away. I snapped some photos but they do her no justice. Click the link above for pictures and for an interview with the artist.

That night after he finished working Jon and I went down to Washington Square for fondue. My sisters, mom, and I ate at this place (Bourgeois Pig) the first time I went to NYC, and Jon went with Corinne and Kyle during one of his work trips yeeeeears ago. That was the day I was in a car crash back in Tucson, and I called to tell him what had happened precisely when the food was placed on the table, so he didn't really eat any of it. This was our first time going together. It was as delicious as I remembered, and Jon was just glad to taste it at all.

Dessert at Big Gay Ice Cream Shop. A "Bea Arthur" for me, a "Salty Pimp" for Jon.

Day four was our last full day there. I'd been secretly hoping I'd be able to duck back into Central Park sometime for more waffles, but it just didn't work out. But when we got back to our hotel, Jon surprised me with one!!! He had walked into the park and bought a couple after he wrapped up at work and stashed them in the hotel as a nighttime snack. I could have cried tears of joy.

I was so exhausted that I ate it laying down, with the box scooted up against my neck to catch crumbs and Nutella drips. I was asleep by 9. According to Jon's phone, we walked FIFTY-FIVE MILES in our four days there!!!

Unpictured from day four: Brunch at Community, the most unbelievable tantrum by Joseph (I now fully understand the meaning of the term "ape-s***" -- it was so bad that we had to take a cab back to Corinne's apartment from Pinkberry because he could not be reasonably or safely moved by foot), and Riverside Park.

Leaving day: We only had time for breakfast before we had to head to the airport. Corinne and Joseph (Ada started school that day) met us at a Le Pain Quotidien near our hotel. Joseph's admiration for Jon continued to wax strong.

Killing fifteen minutes in the park, looking at shapes in clouds.

Jon got upgraded to First Class on the flight back and gave me his ticket. Thanks, Jon! It ended up being only marginally better than coach, though.

I eventually startled him awake when I couldn't stand it anymore.

It's over :(