Friday, April 17, 2009


Easter weekend last year, after filling up the Jeep with gas, Jon returned to the driver’s seat all freaked out because it had cost exactly thirty-three dollars and thirty-three cents to fill the tank, and “that’s how old Jesus was when he died”. Easter weekend, $33.33. Crept him right out. I laughed for an hour, then forgot all about it until yesterday morning when he woke up and exclaimed, “I’m as old as Jesus!”. I considered gifting him a white robe and some sandals in honor of this birthday milestone, but ultimately decided against it (though Jon tells a hilarious story of a new convert attending a Halloween institute dance dressed up as Jesus. I wish I'd been there!). Instead, I got him the usual – a DVD, a sixer of his favorite non-alcoholic beer-flavored beverage, blah blah blah. Borrrring. Worst wife ever.

When I asked him what he was going to spend his birthday money on, he told me he was buying us both Keen sandals in preparation for moving to the Caribbean. TOO BAD, though, because we already bought them last week, NOT for his birthday, and there is NO WAY I'm allowing him to pass that off as his gift to himself. He’s always trying to do that – spend his birthday money on gas, groceries, etc. My mom has taken to getting him ONLY gift cards so he doesn’t have that option, but whenever she enlists me to figure out where he wants his card from, he always drags his feet for so long that I want to call her back and say, “ANTHROPOLOGIE. He wants a gift card to ANTHROPOLOGIE.”

Yes. We bought Keens, so I guess it’s official now. We ARE moving to an island. Jon’s been trying to get me to buy some for years now, but I never had any use for them. Let’s be honest, it’s not like I’m apt to up and hike the Narrows at any given moment, and before now that was really the only reason I could foresee having a use for high-tech hybrid waterproof shoes.

We got them in Phoenix last weekend. Then Penny contracted some form of stomach virus or something on Easter Sunday at my aunt and uncle's house, and it was not pleasant. Jon had to correct me twice when I misidentified the substance she was sharing her crate with. And that's all I want to say about it, because a delicious-looking lemon cake just came out of the oven, and I plan on eating at least two large slices of it immediately. Yes, it's a belated birthday cake, and I don't want to hear about it.

Happy Weekend!


  1. Happy Birthday to Johnny J! I find it sort of interesting that the trip to Phoenix with my husband, he bought me a pair of sandals. Keens to be exact. Turn out, I'm allergic to them. Both feel swelled right up like pumpkins! Whatever, I still love them.

    "Non-alcoholic beer-flavored beverage" - ROFL! Yuck! he might as well have the real thing if his breath is still going to smell like beer. LOL Oh well, husbands. Ya gotta love 'em.

  2. nice pic on the keens, those are the same ones i got. they haven't been worn yet, i think they look weird on my feet. love the color though. maybe i'll bust them out this summer.
    lemon cake sounds delicious.

  3. So I hope it is not creepy that I am commenting again, but I have to let you know, I have no idea how I found your blog but it must have been meant to be. The first post I read was about the names. I showed it to my sister-in-law (who owns Sonora Grill) she adopted a young man from Africa. He had a baby with a crazy girl and she named the baby Mykaeleigh Shinehah Aerynn Grace Ballard. When I read your post I was cracking up. I showed it to her and she linked it to her blog. We both think you are a riot. After you commented she was excited to hear that you had respond and asked me to get your address. She would like to send you a gift card for Sonora Grill. So if you are not completely disturbed by this incredible long & informational post by someone you do not even know, please email me your address at and I will get it to her. Also, would you mind if I linked your blog to mine?
    And even still if you want to check out the name link to your blog
    Last, but not least, where did you have the Sonoran Hot Dog? That is right I was laughing & laughing so I just kept reading.

  4. yeah for the keens! finally converted. so excited! lemon cake? mmmmmmm. darc does the same thing w/cash. idiot. :)

  5. So, call me crazy but I've never heard of these "keens"...sounds like I'm behind the times. Probably. I do live in MOntana ya know. And Happy 33! That's hilarious. I do the same thing with passing off money to gas and groceries. But not this year! This year we're doing Mindi's 29th VEgas style. After all, it is my last birthday...don't girls stop counting at 29? I am.

  6. Mmmmm, lemon cake! You will love the Keens I have 4 pairs, love them all. They went on sale last fall in my kids sizes so they sport them too!!!
    I can't wait to see you guys this summer....