(Two of them have to do with recent incidents in fitting rooms, and one doesn't.)
FIRST: This one I mentioned on Twitter, but not everyone is in the loop of my Twitter (though I can't imagine why) and it's worth repeating. I was trying on clothes at the Forever 21 in Provo two weeks ago, and was only allowed 6 items in the dressing room. The attendant hung the rest on the other side of my door and said I could switch out for new items as I went along. Well a few minutes later I went out for a pair of capris, but they had vanished. Cause for concern, considering they were the only ones in the entire store. When I asked the fitting room girl if she knew where they went, she told me that another girl had asked to try them on and she GAVE THEM TO HER. I managed to keep the snark 60% contained when I told her to retrieve them. And then! The other customer had a bad attitude toward ME over the whole thing!!! She kept asking loudly and irritatedly when she could have them back. Finally I told them both I was buying them, marched them out of the fitting room, and hung them back on the rack.
SECOND: I happened to be in Salt Lake this year for my aunt Mariann's 10th annual magic show neighborhood block party. It was surprisingly entertaining, made HILARIOUS by the whispered running commentary between my friend Christa and me. Anyway, the best part of the entire show was when the magician called up an adorable four year old boy to help out with a trick. It proved a tad too difficult for little Cody to follow right from the very start when he was asked to put his hands on his hips. Cody raised his hands hesitantly, fingers spread, thinking intensely, before placing them uncertainly on his shoulders.
THIRD: Jon was taking his sweet time in the fitting room at TJ Maxx today, and the attendant was putting her limited small talk skills to use on me. First she demanded, "What time is it??" so unexpectedly that I flinched. Then she asked if I was going anywhere for "summer break" and I explained our upcoming trip to my husband's hometown in Canada. She wondered if Canada has a king and a queen, to which I replied that they have a Prime Minister, but they do put the queen of England on their money. Then I hid in the shoe section until Jon emerged from the fitting rooms, confused as to why the attendant had expressed an interest in his upcoming visit to London and commended him for his lack of a British accent.